I used the word "parochial" because all of your arguments seem to involve the USA. As they do, I shall continue to give my perspective from the UK.
It is true that statistics can be twisted; you only have to look at several posts on this forum for examples. If your view is that all statistics are unreliable, then perhaps you should ignore all arguments attacking and defending homosexuality that involve numbers? Certainly do not accept statistics that support your arguments and decry those that do not.
I agree that legislation will not end discrimination. What is needed is the removal of bad legislation that actively promotes discrimination - exactly what had to be done is the US, I understand, to reduce discrimination of blacks, for example.
Similarly I agree that education is needed. Fairly present both sides of the picture and let people decide for themselves. That, of course, depends on being allowed to present all views. In the UK, we have only recently managed to get rid of a repulsive law that had the effect of silencing any discussion (pro or con) of homosexuality in schools.
How you choose to live your life is up to you; nobody has any right to impose a lifestyle on you - as long as you don't try to impose one on others. I would be perfectly happy with the concept of letting people get on living their lives. I take it then that you would have no objection to my lover and I walking down the street holding hands, just like the straight couple in front of us? Kissing when we part, just like the straight couple being separated in the same airport? Having the right to visit my lover in hospital as next of kin when he is seriously ill, just like the partner of the straight man lying in the next bed? What about having the right to continue to live in the house of a deceased partner, just like the straight man next door? These are all things that are currently not allowed in the UK.
You say "gays suffered discrimination only when they made an issue of their sexuality in lieu of just living their lives". That view is presented many times. In reality it comes down to forcing gays to act like "ideal" straights - as long as we don't notice you we'll leave you alone. Try living in a Muslim country like Saudi Arabia for a while and feel what hiding (or at least minimising the visible signs of) your Christianity would feel like.
You make many references to your personal experience. While this is interesting and important to you, it is dangerous and misleading to assume it applies to others. But, as personal experience is de facto here, I'll pass on a story of a couple I know through a common social context.
The husband and wife were cold and disdainful to my partner and me. Last year their 16 year old son (whom we had never met) told them he was gay. They were devastated, but managed to speak to me as the "only gay man" they knew. For the first time in their lives they were forced to think about the real issues and drop historical prejudices. The result - they are now much happier, their son is happier, and we have new friends.