Hannibal I don't know why I am wasting my time commenting on your statement, but here goes...
When you say "stupid idea" are you referring to your crucify statement or to Jesus' command to love one another? Because if you mean the latter you need some serious intercessory prayer.
WHAT in God's name fascinates you so much in not just seeing someone die, but eating their corpse as well?
How did you say it, oh ya, "stupid idea" I wonder where such an out look on the life of a fellow human being could come from, any ideas?
We are all praying for you, The Berlin Bear