Allrite thats it, now I know theres no helping you, the devil has you in his grasp....
"the sickness of your heart and the hate for God that all humans on this planet has! There is nothing you can do to make it go away"
I dont hate God, I love God (swt), and I love all of his prophets too (pbut). If you want to hate God (swt) thats your choice but your destination is hell-fire and its torment. We are not sinners when we are born, we are not born with original sin either. We have free will and it is not in our nature that we will all automatically sin all the time, we have free will and a conciousness that we might make decisions to do good and pious acts, and try and steer away from those evil ones.