The passage in Ephesians instructs husbands to love their wives.
Most women if they are loved as they should be, will submit to their husband through love for him anyway. There should be no need for physical violence.
If a man corrects his wife through physical abuse, it ceases to be an act of love. The woman will submit to her husband as a result yes, but out of fear, rather than out of love for him. On the surface, the woman is obedient and everything is running smoothly. But even after the physical bruises are gone, there are bruises inside which do not heal. My father beat my mother. I get on fine with my dad. I don't feel angry towards him and I have forgiven him as Jesus said that I must. But there is a part of me that is deeply ashamed of what he did and that will always be there.
A child who has to deal with their father violating their mother in this manner may appear to be respectful towards their father. But once again, it is out of fear. Underneath, the child is hurt for their mother and will probably not respect their father. Also, a boy may think this is the way to treat women. A man is so much physically stronger than a woman, it really isn't fair for him to hit her as he is unaware that what seems like a little tap to him can be really quite painful for a woman.
But at the end of the day, men aren't perfect either (except for Jesus ). Who's going to correct them when they go astray? Should stronger men be allowed to beat weaker men when they do wrong?
It is the job of God's Holy Spirit, not men, to convict me of sin.
As with regards to polygamy, how likely is it that a man with more than one wife will love and treat them all exactly the same?